Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Today In Class

We're starting Dante's Inferno in class next week, and to prepare, we've been going over medieval Catholic beliefs. Many of my kids are Southern Baptist and have never heard of Catholicism (first lesson: Catholics are Christians too)--in five years of teaching, I've only ever had two Catholic students.

Kid: So, a preacher is a priest in Catholicism?

Me: Yup, but a priest is a little different from a preacher. A priest doesn't get married, and he swears a vow of chastity. *before the inevitable question* That means they can't have sex.

Kid: NO SEX?!

Me: Nope. None. They're not even supposed to think about it.

Kid: Even the Pope.

Me: Even the Pope.

Kid: But what if he can't help it?

Kid 2: Yeah, what if he sees a hot girl? He can't help thinking about it then.

Kid 3: What if, like, the hot girl just flashes him. It's not his fault she flashes him. I bet he'd have all kinds of sexy thoughts if the hot girl flashes him.

*murmurs of agreement*

Me: NO ONE IS FLASHING THE POPE!

16 comments:

christine M said...

Hee hee. Sounds like an interesting discussion!

Unknown said...

Wow. Just ... wow. I'm crying I'm laughing so hard. I'll never be able to look at a picture of the Pope without thinking of this.

Reverie said...

"No one is flashing the POPE!" ROFL!!!!

lol

kids...8shakes head*

hialrious thanks!

Erin said...

HOW FUNNY! Are you Catholic?? I am... and I have to say this is the first time in my life I've ever heard someone mention "flashing the Pope." HILARIOUS!! I'm sure even the Pope, in that situation, would have to say an extra rosary. ;) LOL! After all, Catholics (including the Pope) are only human too. Thanks for the laugh!!

lotusgirl said...

Holy Cow! I'm dying over here! That's priceless!

Traci said...

*Gasp* I love Dante's Inferno!!!!! When I lived in Florence, I used to go sit in the little chapel where he supposedly met Biatrice. So peaceful there.

Rebachin said...

Ya know, I grew up Baptist and I totally remember wondering if Catholics were Christians, and it wasn't until I was in College and actually had a good friend who was Catholic that I felt like I finally was able to appreciate other denominations...

On another note, about a year ago I picked up a quite nice edition (Everyman's Library Edition) of Dante's Divine Comeday because I believe I should read it (but haven't)... I still think I desperately need to read it.

I'd love to see what your discussion/lessons will be with your students on the Inferno...

Keri Mikulski said...

Love your stories about teaching. :) Hilarious.

Bowman said...

I'm surprised how many people think it is impossible to stop thinking.

About Me said...

Hilarious. And personally, I think they were valid questions :)

Davin Malasarn said...

Beth, I think you have to stop these posts. I'm sharing too many similar thoughts with your students.

Robyn Campbell said...

FUNNY! Man you're so lucky! Your entire day must revolve around laughter! You lucky devil, you! :)

Unknown said...

Glad you guys liked it!!! It was the highlight of my day :)

Shorty: I'm not Catholic (Lutheran, actually), but I've got an Italian side of the family that keeps me well informed. I should ask them what the Pope would do if he were flashed by a hot girl...

Litgirl: OMG!!! Where is that chapel?!?! I am going to Florence next summer and would love to go see it!!!! As for my class, we'll do about a week of Dante. I spend one day on sins and setting up what the allegory is about (symbolism, etc.), one day reading Cantos 1, 2, and 5 (and discussing Beatrice then), then I pick around the middle cantos (Malebolge is nice), and do most of Circle 9--the last canto usually takes me a whole day. I used to let the kids draw pictures, but then the principal came in and saw the kids making a bunch of pics of hell, so I don't do that no more.

Rebachin: Dante's Inferno is quite nice, but honestly a bit hard to read for fun--I always read it with a notebook by my side so I can "interpret" as I read! But there are some priceless hidden jokes in there. Hope your version has good footnotes--some of the best stuff is in the notes!

Crimey and Davin: LOL!!! I can't let my students see this--if they see that adults are thinking along the same lines, they'll stage a trip to Europe just to test their theory that a half naked hot chick will make the Pope think bad thoughts!

Robyn: not too lucky! I've got 70 essays to grade in two days!!!

Christina Farley said...

Too funny! Love it!

PJ Hoover said...

2 Catholic students! Wow.
And how can you be sure no one is flashing the Pope?

BTW, Dante's Inferno is on my list for this year!

Joyce Wolfley said...

I haven't laughed so hard about a blog post in a long time. You should send that one to Reader's Digest! :)