Thursday, December 11, 2008

help?

I think my book is almost ready. I'm still going through word choice--changing verbs and overused words, etc., and don't really plan on attacking that until Christmas break. However, I am most worried about getting Chapter 1 perfect--it's the first impression, after all, and without a strong Chapter 1, I know I won't be going any further in the pubbing game.

So...

Would anyone like to check out my new chapter 1? I've had beta readers and critiquers and all read it, but some of them have read so many different versions for me that I'm afraid they'll scream if I thrust one more chapter on them. And I'd really like to get an idea of what people who haven't read it will think will happen--although anyone who has read it before, I'd love to know if you think this is an improvement.

The new first chapter is here. I've got a poll and enabled comments as well. I would appreciate anything, from a "this works" or "this doens't work" to something more detailed. I really would--and if anyone would like me to read a chapter or two in return, I'd be more than happy to return the favor!

Side note to people who have read Chapter 1 before: I cut most of the original Chapter 1 here, and combined it with the original Chapter 2. My goal was to keep a bit of the suspense at the beginning, but still get to the magic by the end of the chapter...

11 comments:

Justus M. Bowman said...

"I cut most of the original Chapter 1 here, and combined it with the original Chapter 2."

I recently did that as well. Also, I noticed some of your answers to marketing questions sound like answers I would give. Are we writing the same book?!

Just kidding. It is more likely we're going through a similar thought process during our journey to publication.

I might have time to look at your chapter one, but I'm in the middle of a big revision as well. I have a friend of mine looking through my material for the 80th time.

Perhaps I should accept your offer...

Gottawrite Girl said...

I am so curious to see how Firebrand works out for you, my friend! And will be linking to your blog, and your razor-sleuthing skills, as well.

: )

Christine M said...

I looked through chapter 1 for you and left you some comments. I think you are 99% there.

lotusloq said...

What a generous offer. I may take you up on that. I'll go read your first chapter now.

beth said...

Justus--Haha! If your book is so similar to mine, I am sure that it must be simply brilliant :) jk, but I'd love to swap. I adore critiquing and getting feedback.

Susan--Thanks! I will keep everyone posted. To be honest, Firebrand's not my first choice, but I thought the opportunity too good to miss.

Chris--Thanks so much. I feel like you--almost 99% there. I just wish I could figure out the remaining 1%!!

Lois--Absolutely! Like I told Justus, I love swapping!

Justus M. Bowman said...

May I copy your chapter, paste it in Word, make suggestions there, then send you the edited document as an e-mail attachment? If so, what is your e-mail address?

beth said...

Oh, ABSOLUTELY!! That would be brilliant. My addy is bethrevis@gmail.com

Justus M. Bowman said...

I sent the critique. Tell me if it reaches you.

beth said...

Got it and emailed you back :)

Justus M. Bowman said...

Same to you.

I don't think I've ever told you I love your cat picture on this site. I do!

Heather Zundel said...

I'm totally in on this. Just give me a day or two. I would love to help you Beth. How deep/harsh do you want it?